Growing up I was obsessed with everything Sanrio....Hello Kitty and My Melody were my favorites. I spent countless hours staring at the scented markers, erasers, tiny colored pencils, and all the other over-priced stationery. Thing is, when I DID save enough allowance to purchase some of these things, I never used them. They were too pretty to use. They smelled too good. I stored them in my magical trunk that my uncle made me. I would open up the trunk and breathe in all the divine-smelling goodness. This trunk was my happy place and escape. It was safe. It was something I had control over. And I chose to not play with anything. I wish I could say I still have all that precious stuff from my childhood, but I don't. I don't even have the trunk. I am not sure what happened to that trunk. But with all the moves we made, and then me off to college, it probably landed in a yard sale or flea market. If I could go back, I'd play with the stuff. I'd carry it with me everywhere. I'd show it off.
The other day I had a friend say - when she asked me about my new swatch watch - "to hear you talk about this, you are so very serious". I really liked that she was so observant (because I love learning these things about myself. I think friends can really help us grow. the good ones!).....and I realized that I was very serious and protective about these things and the nostalgia. That I felt almost protective. It surprised me that I wasn't sounding playful and having fun. My goal is to play with all the things. To not be so serious. To be ok with the fear that crops up. I have a closet full of dolls that are unopened and the plan is to take a few of them out and "play with them".
My question for you is, do you have something that you are being too serious about?
Do you have fear when you purchase the art supplies and don't open and use them because "they are too pretty"?
Do you protect things that are the most important to you? After all, it's human nature....right?!
Do you find yourself hoarding things and just admiring them on occasion? What are some creative ways that you can enjoy these magical collections?
These are things I struggle with and I am sure that it is all based on fear and wanting to be in control of certain things.
I guess this is where my faith is the ultimate answer. My Faith says that I don't have to be afraid. I don't have to protect and control. I don't have to put away things and enjoy them only every now and then. I am anointed for Joy! I have a Magic inside so powerful that I can create my new nostalgia. I can re-create a new childhood that God has gifted me. He has given me art to create. To have immense joy and it continues to fill up even after I feel absolutely depleted. It is new every morning!!